Dialogue 20101010

Argh.
Omg, you always start your post with some exclamation denoting agony.
No I don't.
You do it a lot of the time. You know that.
Ok. So what.
I find it annoying.
I don't though. I feel like doing it.
Whatever. Let's stop arguing. Why do we always argue?
I don't know. How can we possibly even argue? I mean, you are me right?
Yeah.
So how can I have a conversation like this with myself?
I don't know. You are having it. You just type statements and then you type reactions to the previous statements and so on over and over.
Is that the essence of a conversation?
I don't know. I mean, I might know but I don't feel like trying to answer that.
How do you know that you might know?
Shut up!
Argh.
What?
I feel bad.
Why?
I don't know.
Are you sure you don't know?
Ok, I think I feel bad because... uh... many reasons.
Like?
Like not having a female companion. Urgh, I hate that term. Not having her in my life.
Who?
Eve.
Who is Eve?
Woman.
But isn't woman you?
Doesn't matter, I need an other woman.
You mean you need another you in a different, female body?
Yes.
Why?
Because I feel so fucking lonely without her.
Why does she need to be female?
Because I am not attracted to myself as a male.
So any instantiation of her would do?
Well, not really. That is just the first condition. She also needs to be neither too old or too young. She has to be intelligent enough. Good enough. Wise enough. Beautiful enough.
Anything else? Rich enough? Mentally healthy enough?
What about enlightened enough? Does she need to be enlightened enough?
Like, does she need to realize we are each other?
Argh, how could I possibly find someone like that?
So she doesn't need to be enlightened? Do you think you could last in a relationship with her without her realizing who she is and who you are?
I am God!
How do you know?
I just know.
What if you are wrong.
Doesn't matter if I am.
Why?
Simply coz if I'm not God then whatever.
You mean that it's ok to believe you are God even if you aren't?
If I am not God then nothing really matters, does it?
How does it not, there could be an external God and you could be a soul that he created. And he could send you to hell and shit.
Yeah, well, if that is true then fuck him. I mean, wtf, such a God is the Devil.
Yeah, so maybe you should fear him.
Fuck that man. May I burn in hell for eternity if God is such an asshole.
But what if it's up to you whether you go to hell or heaven?
But then I am God!
But what if it is up to you only now and later, when you die, he will judge you based on how you acted here?
You mean, that God will decide whether I go to heaven or hell depending on how I freely chose to act in this life?
Yeah.
Well fuck that. I don't think anyone should go to hell, even people much worse than me, even the worst of the worst. NOBODY should go to hell.
But what if God disagrees?
Then FUCK his opinion.
What if God will send you to hell if you rebel like that.
Then fuck him and his whole insane scheme.
I mean wtf. Anyway, I am sick of this shit. I am God and that's that.
Ok.
So what do we do now, your divinity? Shall I bow to you?
Shut up. I wanna fuck.
So go fuck.
But I don't feel attractive enough.
So make yourself attractive enough.
But I don't know how to do that.
So figure out.
But I don't know whether making myself attractive enough to feel like fucking is what I really want to spend my time on.
So what do you wanna spend your time on?
I don't know.
So figure it out!
Why should I?
Don't fucking ask me. You can answer that one.
But I am you.
Argh, you piss me off so fucking much.
Why? Why do I piss you off?
Coz you are so stupid.
Why am I stupid?
I don't know.
So there you go. We don't know anything.
I do know I am God.
Yeah, but that's about it. You don't even know what being God means.
I know it means I experience everything.
Ok, so what?
So everything.
So what if everything?
So everything! It means I can experience everything!
You said you already do that.
Yeah, but there is this illusion going on that makes it feel like I can create my experiences.
Is that an illusion?
Yes and no. I can't help but create everything I can create.
So how is it an illusion that you create new experiences?
Because there is nothing else I can do. It doesn't come into contrast with anything. I am what I am and I experience what I experience and that is that.
Oh is it? Isn't there a variation to what you experience?
It seems like there is? But do I have control over what I experience?
Well, don't you? I mean, you are God. Who has the control if not you? Chuck Norris? Randomness?
Maybe the ontological potential has control by containing all experiences I can have.
But the ontological potential is *unbound*!
How do you know? And what do you even mean by unbound?
I mean it has no limits.
How do you know that?
I don't.
So why do you say that?
To make you feel good perhaps?

Lol, I just listened to the whole thing with Microsfot Narrator, in a female voice. This is weird.
No it isn't.
But it feels weird.
So what?
So whatever.
Aaah, unbound or not unbound, it's still so fucking huge. Bring the good shit on already!
I mean come on people, why are you arguing so fucking much instead of enjoying yourselves?
Let's just fucking enjoy ourselves. There is nothing better to do. Let's make each other beautiful and healthy and happy. And let's love each other. What sort of stupid rainbow are you guys chasing?
But it's not that simple. People are not content the way things are. Things are too hard, too painful, too ugly.
So let's fix all that!
ALL OF IT. Let's fucking fix the whole shit.
But people are afraid! They don't know whether that is possible!
Yeah, that is their biggest fucking problem. Everyone is a coward these days. Afraid to think. WTF is wrong with God these days?
What the fuck is wrong with you you mean?
Yeah, whatever, what the fuck is wrong with me?
You are ignorant, that is all. You are having a bad trip.
So change it. Make it good!
You have to do that.
How?
Do what you want. That is the essence of everything. Just do what you REALLY want to do. And stop fearing the consequences. Those will come no matter what. The more you understand how it all works there better you are at predicting them.
RELY on your present understanding.